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This community absolutely wins and my mother never fails to give me priceless VK moments, so I finally remembered to record one to share!

First of all, my mother is an immense Visual Kei fan. And not old VK, either (although she does have a soft spot for X Japan). She listens to all of the bands I do and we spend ridiculous amounts of time discussing rockers. She's also very attached to the band members, especially her favorite members. She once said, and I quote...

"I never understood why people were so upset when the Beatles broke up, but now I do."

She cried because bis disbanded, because 176BIZ disbanded, because Aoi of Ayabie's mother passed away, because Tora of alice nine has health issues, and so on.

Also, she is well aware that the members are men (at least in all of the bands we listen to), but she still calls the more "feminine" members "she." Basically, all members who dress explicitly feminine, have feminine facial features, or act effeminately are called "she" by my mother.

That said, on to the actual story!

WARNING! PG content!Collapse )

hello people!^^

So the other day my mum came back from shopping and gave me a new toothbrush^^
(I know, sad. xD )
So I thought I'd share my happiness with my friend.

So I text her and went:"I GOT A NEW TOOTHBRUSH!!! And it's PURPLE!!"

She text back and went:"WHY did that remind me of Uruha's purple shorts? O__o"
Me: X'D

Thank you for the attention.^^


headbanging & Yoshiki

This happened today before my mum left to go to work.

So me and my bro were in my room (I'm trying to turn him into a jrock fan) and we were listening "Filth in the Beauty" by The GazettE.

You know when they headbang hard in the middle of the song?
Well, me and my bro did the same and that's when my mum comes in...

Me & my bro: *headbanging hard*
My mum: *looks at us with blank face*
Me & my bro: *look at each others then look at our mum*
My mum: .......I want my children back
Me & my bro: wtf?! o.O

2 hrs later

I was listening to "Forever Love" by X Japan.
My mum walks by...

Mum: Oh... finally a beautiful song... not that bullshit you listen all the time
Me: Mum... this is still that "bullshit" *sends her evil glare while showing a pic of X Japan*
Mum: *looks at Yoshiki*.... He's sexy
Me: yeah, I know...
Mum: .... what if I divorce from ur father and marry him?
Me: o.O I'd love you 10.000 more!!!!
Mum: hmm... I'll think about it *leaves*
Me: XD what?!

More stories! =3

Yeah, I have a ton of stories X3 Here are some more~

Story-spam!Collapse )

I'll have more later...

Because someone asked...

Since mimz_song asked - and since I'm on my lunch break - here are a couple incidences with some other family members.

I really didn't mean to traumatize the poor kid...Honest!Collapse )

Well, break's over, so I'll come back with more later.

Ah, grandmas...

Well, I have another story about my grandma X3 (because she's the only person other than my mom I see on a regular basis).

You'd think she would learn...Collapse )

Well, that's all I really have right now, but my brother is going to be here to visit in a couple of weeks and that should be highly entertaining as far as exposing him to JRock some more goes. (I'll have to post some older stories about him, next).

You ask I give

Wow, my second post already! haha well I'm posting more just for mimz_song ^^

Ok, so before... I talked about my friends, well that's nothing compared to my wonderful family
First let me tell you that I do not lie. My family really is like this, sad to say.
My father IS crazy.

So I was staying at my parent's house for the weekend. I was sitting at the kitchen table with my computer just looking through LJ ^^
My dad walks in, eating an apple and stops behind me.

Dad: Do you ever get off that thing?
Me: -Evil glare- Its not like there is anything else to do.
Dad: You're wasting time.
Me: I am not, I'm getting pictures.
Dad: Of what?
Me: Jrockers.
Dad: ..... -takes a bit of his apple- What the hell is that? Some kind of cult.
Me: No Dad.... they are like the japanese versions of rock stars only...better -shows him versailles- and they wear really cool outfits and...stuff
Dad: -looks at me, looks at the picture, looks at me- you.... are not my child. -leaves-

ok so yeah, he though jrock was a cult.... hehehe could be? xD
so my grandma. (btw, shes like hardcore jesus freak. nothing wrong with it! just... its my grandma lol)
i was at her house, (again) on my computer looking at pictures of Kai
She walks up to me and looks at the comp while i flip through the pictures and says nothing.
I finally turn to her and smile.
Me: Isn't he just the cutest thing?
Gma: well now ashley... i wouldn't call him... he looks like a woman. -worried look on her face-
Me: He's a guy, promise. -changes picture-
Gma: Ok... thats a bit better. He looks kind of like a man -squints her face-
Me: -changes to a pic of him smiling-
Gma: Oh, see now Ashley thats cute.
Me: yes, I know. ^^
Gma: so you really like men that look like women?
Me: if you think he looks like a woman... -shows her bou and hizaki-
Gma: ..... Now see thats just wrong. why would they want to look like... is he wearing a skirt.... I don't get this. -shakes her head-

ok so yeah. thats all i'm going to write for now XD

New Member ^^

Okay so I read through some of what has been posted
I had to join
I mean this is classical Jrock 101 - "Always trick people into thinking Jrockers are women....then tell them they're actually men"
then watch, laugh and repeat
So hear is my little story.

I was sitting in my room, minding my own business when my friend Fons busts in.
I just sigh and keep staring at my computer which at the time was playing An Cafe's "Smile Ichiban II Onna" PV

He walks up behind me and just stands there.
Fons: Whatcha doooooin?
Me: Watching this video.
Fons: Whhhy?
Me: Fons... cause I want to! Go away.
Fons: Who's that? -points to Bou-
Me: *smiles* Bou
Fons: Are they Japanese?
Me: Yes Fons -getting annoyed-
Fons: I would do her so hard
Me: *snort*
Fons: I would. I'd be like... hey there sexy!
Me: Fons
Fons: What?
Me: That's a man.
Fons: Who is?
Me: Bou -points at Bou again with cute little cat ears on-
Fons: ..... -backs away from me-
Me: *laughs*
Fons: .... YOU LIE!
Me: Nope
Fons: ..... I hate you.... -leaves-
Me: hehehehe he's gone~~

Okay, college boys are stupid I know. Ok so one more.
I was in my dorm, as usual, Gazette posters proudly all over my walls.
My friend Sam walks in.
Sam: Hey, Ash. Can I need some scissors.
Me: -looks for some scissors-
Sam: -sits on my bed- Why do you have all these girls on your wall? Who are they? This one is creepy. -points to reita-
Me: -looks up- they're men
Sam: Ash, no they aren't. These are women. I'm sorry but they are.
Me: No, they really aren't dear.
Sam: -points at Ruki's crotch- THERE IS NO PENIS HERE!
Me: -chokes- How do you know?
Sam: I know these things. They're women.
Me: Let me show you something. -goes to my computer and finds pics of Uruha in the purple outfit from the Barette solo and points to his crotch- Penis... right here
Sam: ..... I'm leaving.

Anyways, I have plenty more but thats all i can remember now
Gotta love people who have never seen a man wearing purple shorts, playing the guitar in a live and.... a giant buldge ^^;;
I think I changed her perspective on the term "man"

new member!

hello mama sama. :)

*a few days ago*
my april fool's mate and kera are on the floor. my mom points to my fool's mate.
mom: whats wrong with his nose?
me: what?
mom: is it injured or something? why is he covering his face like that?
me: that's part of his costume!
mom: well no one else has their noses bandaged. and they all look grumpy.

*a couple minutes ago*
my mom was looking through kera.
me: when u get to the last page tell me
*mom goes to last page*
me: *points* he's the singer of plastic tree. (i was forcinghaving her listen to my songs earlier)
mom: *weird look* he? he doesn't look like a girl or boy!
me: hes a guy!
mom: why is he wearing a skirt? and he look totally girly. and he has no eyebrows.
me: -___- *points to reita* whats his name then?
mom: i don't know!
me: it's RAY-TA. or REE-TA. whats his name?
mom: *points to ryuutarou* rayda.
(keep in mind that my mom has an accent)
me: no! *points to reita* that's reita!
mom: *starts laughing hysterically* well how am i supposed to tell them apart?! his face is all covered!
so she starts talking about if ruki had a noseband on they would look the same. and that reita's nose is probably injured.
me: *points to reita* what's his name?
mom: rayda? like those message signal things?
me: -____-" that's RAYDAR! he's REITA!

my mom now calls reita "raydar." and sincrea "cingular." and when i ask her what kanon wakeshima's last name is she says "kanon" because she can't remember.  

More? Okay.

So, I guess as a request from mimz_song, I have a little more to post about my family. xD' Sorry to those who don't care much.

I think it's really hilarious how defensive my mom is of Toshi from X Japan. She thinks he's so cool and always wants him to be that makeup-covered, leather-clad 23 year old he once was. Unfortunately, when I try to remind her that he's older and less wild, she freaks out. xD' An example being:
Me: So, I've been listening to more of Toshi's healing music lately.
Mom: ... healing music...
Me: Yeah, it's really grea--
Mom: Why do you have to say that? (slump)
Me: Say what? Healing music?
Mom: YES! Toshi's cool! Why are you being mean to him like that?
Me: Being mean?... Mom, that's what he does now, he's helping sick people--
Mom: I don't want to hear it! He'll always be the X Japan Toshi I know!
Me: Uhh, I'm sure he will. (cough)

I've slowly been getting her used to the idea of Toshi being old (haha), but she's still convinced I'm just trying to get her to hate Toshi. I don't know who to feel worse for, my mom or Toshi.

I don't think I've talked much about my brother on here yet (that's surprising). Probably because he's extremely educated in the ways of J-rock.
The other night we were playing The Sims 2, and for whatever god forsaken reason, he decided to make a family of Miku, Miyavi and a 10 cent whore. Then he got the amazing idea to make Miyavi a fat loser (xD we both love Miyavi, for the record, nothing against him) and Miku be a sex fiend (because that would be hilarious and mildly creepy).
So all night, he was yelling at his laptop screen, "Keep eating those toaster pastries, fatty!" to the Miyavi sim while Miku impregnated whores. xD' No, we have no lives.

Chris: Look, all the girls are trying to get to Miku because he's such a STUD MUFFIN! THEY JUST CAN'T RESIST HIS DELICIOUS MAN-MEAT! Oh no, Miyavi burned his macaroni, what a loser. (cackle)

And various other disturbing things. He did horrible things to those sims all while hitting me in the face with my own X Japan plushies... (Yes, he is an ass.) Once done with that, we both fangirled over Atsushi. My brother just thinks Atsushi is the sexiest guy on earth, haha.